“Follow me!” my choir director commanded. “You’re not following me!” And he slammed his hand on the piano as the entire choir stared down at me from the risers. My face flushed. I felt stupid. This was a daily occurance.

It was my senior year in high school and I thought accompanying the choir looked like fun. My choir director must have regretted his decision to allow me to accompany. I don’t remember him not being angry. I do remember being puzzled. I couldn’t understand why he thought I wasn’t following him. But, I decided I was going to figure it out. 

So I practiced the choir music until I had it memorized. I wanted to know the accompaniment by heart as I didn’t want to take my eyes off of him for fear that I might get off. 

I remember when I performed my solo at the District contest, he was in the audience. I earned a “I” rating. The judge wrote on my critique sheet “I expect to hear more of you.” My choir director told me afterwards that until then he didn’t think I could play the piano. I thought, “Well, I’d perform better for you if you didn’t yell everyday and embarrass me in front of everyone.”

I decided if I ever taught piano, I would believe in my students.  I wasn’t the only one who needed someone’s belief. It took years before I could accompany a choir again without fear of making mistakes and being yelled at and shamed.

I had a good professor when I was working on my BA. When I started working on my MM in Piano Performance, I had difficulty transitioning to a different teacher. There was one part of a piece I wasn’t getting. Each week my professor went over and over that same spot with me, and every week I could tell he was getting more and more frustrated. 

When I left my lesson one week, I knew if I didn’t fix it he would kick me out of his studio. And if that happened I was pretty sure no other professor at the university would take me.

So that week I practiced that measure for hours. I played it in many different ways. I felt very apprehensive when I went to my next lesson. I played the passage for him and he said “Okay. That’s fine. You know if you didn’t get it I was going to kick you out of my studio today?” I knew. 

I wish he could’ve found ways to explain to me what I was doing wrong instead of just getting angry. The more upset he got, the more difficult it was for me to understand anything. All I could hear and feel was the anger.

I had started teaching and decided I would work hard to find ways to help my students understand. If they weren’t getting it I kept working to find a way. I never wanted my students to feel I didn’t believe in them.

The next year I entered the State Collegiate Competition. I was 27 and that was the last year I could enter, the following year I would be too old. My professor didn’t want me to enter, I presumed because he didn’t think I was good enough.  After I performed, one of the students from another professor’s studio at the university passed on to me a comment from his teacher about my playing. He told me his professor thought I should have received an honorable mention. That meant so much to me.

I wondered why my professor never gave me any positive reinforcement, so I asked him if I was doing okay? And he said that if I wasn’t, he would have told me. Interesting.

I resolved I would let my students know when they were doing well. I wouldn’t just let them assume they could read my mind.

After I performed “The Chromatic Fantasy and Fugue” for one of my Masters recitals, one of my friends, who was a Doctoral Candidate in Piano, told me “I can’t believe how good that was!” She kept repeating that, which encouraged me very much.

I decided I wanted to become good at encouraging my students, because I knew what it was like to have a teacher not believe in me. I knew how alone that felt. 

After I made that decision, I began to draw students to me who had struggles. A number of them had ADHD, ADD, and/or were on the Autism Spectrum. Some had emotional issues and high levels of frustration and anxiety. These students found a special place in my heart, because they had extra struggles, and I knew they needed me to believe in them. I had no experience, or special training on how to teach them, so I had to learn on the job.

We had many difficult lessons. My students had wonderful parents who were very supportive. Still, in some lessons a student would go into screaming fits, another student would get so frustrated he cried, another would become intensely angry and try to hurt himself. These occurrences were regular. Often I wondered, “What am I doing?” I wasn’t sure I was helping my students, that maybe I should just find someone else who was more skilled to help them. Instead, though, I read books, went to workshops, and tried things. And the parents continued to trust me. So I kept working with their children. As long as these students were with me, my responsibility was to find a way to help them. In the process I discovered they were a gift to me. Their success became absolutely exhilarating for me.

Recently, one of these students, at his last lesson, thanked me for never giving up on him. Hearing this amazed me! I am grateful to have been his teacher and to watch him grow into a fine young person more at peace with himself.

Another student, in preparing a piece for a contest, struggled with burnout and being really hard on himself. I was talking with his father before the son’s lesson, and his father said “good luck” just before I went into the lesson. During the lesson I talked with my student about mind set blocks and engaged him in discussion about how to overcome them. After his lesson his father reinforced those things as they were headed out the door. My student pushed through his burn out, and polished his piece for his performance. I was so proud of him!

Although I had these successes, during these past two years of the pandemic I got very drained. I would come home from work and have very little energy to teach. I even wondered if I should find some other line of work. Then I attended an online workshop and the first assignment was to write a list of ten things of why “I am awesome and wonderful”.The amount of how much I have accomplished amazed me, and I still have a lot to offer. And I discovered my deeper “why” that underlies everything I do.  

I help people unlock their potential so they can see their possibilities, heal themselves, and uplift and inspire others.

Because of this I have a passion to help other teachers discover why they are awesome. I want to coach teachers to help their students who have ADHD, ADD, Autism, and/or emotional and anxiety issues release the music within them. I know what it’s like to have difficult lessons with students week after week and wonder “what am I doing this for? I’m not doing any good.” We all need support.

We, as music teachers, are uniquely positioned to make life changing differences in our students.

Imagine, instead of letting go of your dreams and just trying week after week to keep things calm, that you have a coach so you can help your students create breakthroughs, and then see the look on their faces as they fluidly express the music within them.

My mission is to help music teachers release the music within their ADHD, ADD, and Autism Spectrum students. 

Here is what one of my clients is saying about me.

I have completed the training and it has helped me immensely. I have learned more tools for myself and my students to help with learning readiness and calming strategies. I’ve brought specific teaching issues, both technical and general, to Hemdah, where she always has great ideas. She approaches her coaching with a calm and caring spirit and she will tailor to your specific needs. She has an organized program and always comes ready for the session with her vast knowledge and wisdom. If you’re thinking about it, I highly recommend it!

LISA MCCLUER, PIANO TEACHER, MISSION KS

Here is what teachers are saying about me.

Hemdah was a fantastic teacher for my girls. Being a musician myself, it was very important that I found a top tier educator for my daughters. Hemdah’s positive atmosphere, the “you-can-do-this” attitude paired with high expectations and high quality instruction made this a perfect fit. I feel very fortunate to have found Hemdah. She is certainly a diamond in the industry and I cannot think of a better piano teacher for my girls. I even borrowed several of her teaching techniques and use them in my classroom to this day. Hemdah is the real deal, a class act, has a heart of gold and a genuine passion for children. Hemdah is at the top of her game!

DR. TIM J. ALLSHOUSE.   DIRECTOR OF BANDS, BLUE SPRINGS HIGH SCHOOL

There is in your teaching and interactions with students a deeper well of patience, support, and meaningful interaction that has really touched my heart. I just love how you are never satisfied with being a “good” teacher, but are always willing to adapt and try new ways of reaching students.

Thank you for your prayerful approach to teaching our children. You have a huge influence on their lives and we are absolutely blessed by you! Hugs and thanks!

AMY JEFFERS, VOICE TEACHER, INDEPENDENCE, MO

I am so thankful for our friendship and to teach alongside you. Thanks for being so talented, kind, patient, and wonderful. You are such a great example for our students.

SHELBY LAIRD, CHORAL DIRECTOR, WILLIAM CHRISMAN HIGH SCHOOL, INDEPENDENCE, MO

If you want support in helping your students who have ADHD, ADD, and/or are on the Autism Spectrum, or have high anxiety, or emotional issues, release the music within them, and you are searching for ideas, guidance, or systems to help your students be all they can be, I want to hear from you. I want to be of service to my fellow music teachers.

Book your free 30 minute support call by clicking on the link below. I want to hear your struggles and strategize how I can help you begin the transformation process.

https://Freesupportcall.as.me/Freeconnectcall