What have you learned from your failures?
What have you learned from your failures? We don't like to talk about that, but, it’s been said we learn more from our failures than we do from our successes.
I used to perform at the end of every one of my studio recitals, now I perform at every other one. I used to set it up in my head that I had to be perfect because here I am presenting myself to my students as someone who knows what they're doing and how to perform.
In the midst of many performances, I'd be thinking, “Oh my gosh, this is horrible. This is not going well, all those mistakes—this is awful!” This was a failure. But I made sure those feelings didn’t show on my face.
When I arrived home I would listen to the recording and was always surprised. I'd listen and I'd watch. And I would think, “Where are those mistakes? Where are those huge note mistakes and those glitches in my performance?” I realized whatever is happening on stage, whatever I'm thinking about how bad it seemed to me, it must be the adrenaline working in me, and it's heightened my sense of mistakes. But it doesn’t come across to the audience.
After a number of years of watching the recordings of my performances, I realized I could relax. My mistakes just aren’t that noticeable. I now tell myself “It’s all going very well. It’s sounding better to the audience than it does to me.” I've passed this on to my students. I share this with them because I know it will help them relax with themselves. When we are up in front of people and that adrenaline is pumping, all of our perceived mistakes seem huge to us, but they don't sound that way to anyone else.
What have you learned from your failures, or from your perceived failures? I’d love to hear from you.
I am Hemdah, a pianist and piano teacher, specializing in teaching ADHD, and ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) students, who guide parents and music teachers, in creating extraordinary results in their children, and doing it in a way that avoids frustration and overwhelms.
